"Polygamy"- means having more than one wife or husband at the same time. this is the definition that i have copied directly from my cellphone dictionary. i know most of you would think of polygamy as having more than one wife and also if you observe the definition stated it describes the "wife" aspect first. May be it was unintentional. but then i'll give you a Gen -X outlook at polygamy. so we'll need to handle both issues one by one.
More than one wife:-
1) Advantages:- You would enjoy some variety in your sex life(i couldn't have been more sober).
- You will never put on weight because the amount of calories you burn while having sex will eventually compensate.
- Population explosion will be taken care of(well, we could use a few homosexuals in this country for that matter;))
- There are more earning members so the family can afford to live a luxurious life. hey, atleast the children wont starve.
- The daily chores are taken care of.
- You will not have to worry about money management because women are far better than the grocer in that case.
- In case one of the wives die, runs away, demands divorce or is hospitalized the family will still run smoothly.
- The husband and children can relish the variety in cuisine.
- Children can benefit from the extra guidance and support from all their mothers.
2) Disadvantages:- Scheduling your nights will become necessary.(Sorry guys, you cant have multiple erections so rapidly)
-Husbands will need to remember so many names, birthdays and wedding anniversaries.
-It would be a major disaster if all your wives unite, however, it would be a disaster even if they fought among themselves.
- Toddlers would have a hard time remembering the names of all the 'mothers'.
-Children would have a tough time selecting a bride or groom for themselves as women niggle in these situations.
- Shopping is an insatiable passion for women. however, there is a propensity to spend their husbands income or expect their husbands to gift them.
- your mother will find it difficult to have a favourite daughter-in- law
More than one husband:
i kinda have a dilemma here. having more than one husband is not an issue but according to all communities, women are supposed to live with their husbands. Obviously, if we continue this trend, women will have a harder time then men as they'll need to travel a lot unless they find men living in same colony. but then again they would'n want one husband peeping through his window at their other husband's house while they act naughty;)
lets assume we are able to change the trend and now the husband goes to the wife's house.
Advantages:
- women can achieve multiple orgasms. so they'll have an excellent sex life. variety is the spice of life and fulfillment is achievable for her as she always has alternatives.
- men never argue over petty issues. so more than one man in the house will not be a trouble.
- if one husband falls ill, dies or elopes with another man or woman, the family still remains flourished.
- if you are a housewife, you will have multiple finances to your shopping.
-some of the best known chefs around the globe are men, so the probability remains of you hitting the jackpot.
- population explosion is better curbed as compared to having multiple wives.
Disadvantages:
- men usually engage in conversations over politics, current issues and business which can keep them engaged for hours as compared to women who can be kept occupied by gossip.
-it would be a disaster if a couple of your husbands turn gay. you will end up facing heavy losses. this wont be the case with multiple wives due to the fact that women cannot stay in harmony unless they are sisters. also, the spice of variety is better longed for by men than women.
this was the best i could come up with. i am sure i have missed out on petty issues but the issues mentioned here are unavoidable in ones married life. in case you are longing for multiple life partners, the above points can help your thought.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Thursday, November 26, 2009
A tribute.
A year has passed by since the dreadful event took place in mumbai. I dont know if i should express my sorrow for the victims of 26/ 11 or honour the bravery of those who sacrificed their lives for mumbai city. i am one of those who can least gauge the intensity of the whole tragedy. The memories of that night are still fresh in my mind when it began for me with a 'breaking news' on star news channel which flashed that, "firing was taking place between two groups at colaba". Initially, we didnt express much concern as we thought it to be local hooligans involved in some kind of gang-wars. i changed the channel. i went back to the news channel a couple of times but the same news was being flashed. Finally, we switched off the television and went to sleep. Until next morning none in my family had the slightest idea of what was going around.
Next morning my father learnt bout the terrorist attack when he saw the news on the television early in the morning at 5 am. My mother wakes up at 6 and leaves fro work at 7am. Apparently, she wasn't willing to stay home as she is a nurse and realised that she had to reach the hospital. My father instructed me and my brother to stay at home. He himself left for work as usual at 9 am. Also, my brother left for bandra at around 11am. The incident took place in southern mumbai and the western line was somehow incapable of realising the situation. Many people went to their offices. The next morning, while the NSG were at full throttle at the taj and nariman point, life on the western line seemed pretty normal.
Many news flashes have been hitting since across the television displaying different aspects or the tragedy. The hard work of the security forces yielded some fruit in form of 'kasab'. This again began a news flash for a couple of days. The most recent headlines have been involvement of David Headley and Rana in the terrorist attacks. Trials on kasab are still in process, discussions with pakistan are still in process and various other political activities are in process. But the question remains, what has changed in mumbai in one year?
As a common man, i cannot list many changes i have seen. The most amusing move by the government was that of declaring election day as a holiday. More surprising was the fact that it did not create a desired difference in the voting from the mumbai suburbs. I do not wish to complain but the fact remains that even after 26/11/2008, mumbai is as vulnerable as it was a year back. The lone survived terrorist, even after committing such a hieneous crime, can assure himself of his safety. However, i doubt a considerable amount of mumbaikars could witness some permanent measures for public safety. May be permanent is an ideal term, but at least i have the right to expect some implications in the security of the city. Many may hate me for this statement but people of mumbai are more at fault than the government. At the end of the day, all that we do is comment on the actions of the government, light candles at the gateway to express our sorrows, send patriotic sms's to our friends, create communities on orkut and facebook, highlight the sorrows of those suffered and many more unproductive activities. In all these activities that we are proudly participating, where have we made the difference? where have we assured ourselves and our society of their security? When i say this, some would comment that security is the responsibility of the police and army and we are not here to fight terrorist. Sorry, but i dont have much to say to people who think in this manner. As it is said , easier said than done, such people will always remain spectators in freedom struggle. In the end, i am equally useless, because i know i havent contributed anything for my country nor my city in this last 1 year. Please ask yourselves, what have you done in this past year that could make a difference.
Next morning my father learnt bout the terrorist attack when he saw the news on the television early in the morning at 5 am. My mother wakes up at 6 and leaves fro work at 7am. Apparently, she wasn't willing to stay home as she is a nurse and realised that she had to reach the hospital. My father instructed me and my brother to stay at home. He himself left for work as usual at 9 am. Also, my brother left for bandra at around 11am. The incident took place in southern mumbai and the western line was somehow incapable of realising the situation. Many people went to their offices. The next morning, while the NSG were at full throttle at the taj and nariman point, life on the western line seemed pretty normal.
Many news flashes have been hitting since across the television displaying different aspects or the tragedy. The hard work of the security forces yielded some fruit in form of 'kasab'. This again began a news flash for a couple of days. The most recent headlines have been involvement of David Headley and Rana in the terrorist attacks. Trials on kasab are still in process, discussions with pakistan are still in process and various other political activities are in process. But the question remains, what has changed in mumbai in one year?
As a common man, i cannot list many changes i have seen. The most amusing move by the government was that of declaring election day as a holiday. More surprising was the fact that it did not create a desired difference in the voting from the mumbai suburbs. I do not wish to complain but the fact remains that even after 26/11/2008, mumbai is as vulnerable as it was a year back. The lone survived terrorist, even after committing such a hieneous crime, can assure himself of his safety. However, i doubt a considerable amount of mumbaikars could witness some permanent measures for public safety. May be permanent is an ideal term, but at least i have the right to expect some implications in the security of the city. Many may hate me for this statement but people of mumbai are more at fault than the government. At the end of the day, all that we do is comment on the actions of the government, light candles at the gateway to express our sorrows, send patriotic sms's to our friends, create communities on orkut and facebook, highlight the sorrows of those suffered and many more unproductive activities. In all these activities that we are proudly participating, where have we made the difference? where have we assured ourselves and our society of their security? When i say this, some would comment that security is the responsibility of the police and army and we are not here to fight terrorist. Sorry, but i dont have much to say to people who think in this manner. As it is said , easier said than done, such people will always remain spectators in freedom struggle. In the end, i am equally useless, because i know i havent contributed anything for my country nor my city in this last 1 year. Please ask yourselves, what have you done in this past year that could make a difference.
Monday, November 16, 2009
सांग मला......
खूप काम होते आज तुला,
थकलीस इतकी की झोपूनच राहिलीस,
लवकर उठ मला भूक लागली,
आज गप्प आहेस इतकी, काय झाले तुला, सांग मला ?
हे सारे रडत आहेत कशाला,
काकू का मला इतके घट्ट धरतेय?
बाबा पण दीदीला जवळ घेउन बसले,
तूच का नाही मला जवळ घेत , सांग मला ?
आकाशातील तो गोलस दिवा विझला,
पण अजुन तू घरातील दिवा नाही लावलास ,
मी चार ओळ शुभंकरोतिचे पाठ केले ,
पण बाबा त्याला चूक का म्हणाले, सांग मला?
उठ न आई आता किती झोपणार,
माझ्या लहानश्या हाकेने उठणारी तू,
आज इतके लोक भोवती असता पण झोपलीस,
कोणी रागावले का तुला, सांग मला?
कसेतरी होते आता मला,
इतकी गर्दी आणि सगळे विनाकारण रड्तायत ,
मला पण रडू येते,
अश्रु पूस पदराने आई, आणि बरं वाटेल असं काही सांग मला.
मी काल खेळण्यासाठी हट्ट केला,
म्हणून रागावली नाहीस ना?
की आज पुन्हा भाजी उरली,
म्हणून राग आला माझा तुला, सांग मला ?
हो! माझा नक्कीच राग आलाय तुला,
म्हणून इतका वेळ गप्प होतीस ,
डोळे मिटून त्या सफ़ेद पांघरुणात झोपलीस ,
मला एकदाही पहावेसे वाटले नाही तुला, सांग मला ?
ह्याच क्षणी मी वचन देतो तुला,
हट्ट नाही करणार खेळण्यासाठी कधी ,
तू वाढलेली भाजी सुध्दा गपचुप खाणार,
काय करू की राग जाईल तुझा सांग मला ?
कुठे नेतायत हे सारे तुला,
बाबा म्हणतात तू कामासाठी परदेशी चाललीस ,
सगळे तुझ्या सोबत घराबाहेर पडतायत, मला सोडून,
जिथे तू चाललीस तिथे सोबत का नेत नाही मला, सांग मला?
थकलीस इतकी की झोपूनच राहिलीस,
लवकर उठ मला भूक लागली,
आज गप्प आहेस इतकी, काय झाले तुला, सांग मला ?
हे सारे रडत आहेत कशाला,
काकू का मला इतके घट्ट धरतेय?
बाबा पण दीदीला जवळ घेउन बसले,
तूच का नाही मला जवळ घेत , सांग मला ?
आकाशातील तो गोलस दिवा विझला,
पण अजुन तू घरातील दिवा नाही लावलास ,
मी चार ओळ शुभंकरोतिचे पाठ केले ,
पण बाबा त्याला चूक का म्हणाले, सांग मला?
उठ न आई आता किती झोपणार,
माझ्या लहानश्या हाकेने उठणारी तू,
आज इतके लोक भोवती असता पण झोपलीस,
कोणी रागावले का तुला, सांग मला?
कसेतरी होते आता मला,
इतकी गर्दी आणि सगळे विनाकारण रड्तायत ,
मला पण रडू येते,
अश्रु पूस पदराने आई, आणि बरं वाटेल असं काही सांग मला.
मी काल खेळण्यासाठी हट्ट केला,
म्हणून रागावली नाहीस ना?
की आज पुन्हा भाजी उरली,
म्हणून राग आला माझा तुला, सांग मला ?
हो! माझा नक्कीच राग आलाय तुला,
म्हणून इतका वेळ गप्प होतीस ,
डोळे मिटून त्या सफ़ेद पांघरुणात झोपलीस ,
मला एकदाही पहावेसे वाटले नाही तुला, सांग मला ?
ह्याच क्षणी मी वचन देतो तुला,
हट्ट नाही करणार खेळण्यासाठी कधी ,
तू वाढलेली भाजी सुध्दा गपचुप खाणार,
काय करू की राग जाईल तुझा सांग मला ?
कुठे नेतायत हे सारे तुला,
बाबा म्हणतात तू कामासाठी परदेशी चाललीस ,
सगळे तुझ्या सोबत घराबाहेर पडतायत, मला सोडून,
जिथे तू चाललीस तिथे सोबत का नेत नाही मला, सांग मला?
Thursday, October 22, 2009
शोध...
विचारना माझ्या वाट सापडत नाही ,
ज्ञानाला माझ्या उपयोग सापडत नाही,
शब्दाना माझ्या अर्थ सापडत नाही,
प्रयत्नाना माझ्या यश सापडत नाही,
प्रेमाला माझ्या प्रेम सापडत नाही,
कष्टाना माझ्या फळ सापडत नाही,
दुक्हाना माझ्या समाधान सापडत नाही,
सुखाना माझ्या आयु सापडत नाही,
विश्वासाला माझ्या आधार सापडत नाही,
जीवनाला माझ्या कारण सापडत नाही,
कवितेला माझ्या पूर्णविराम ही सापडत नाही.
ज्ञानाला माझ्या उपयोग सापडत नाही,
शब्दाना माझ्या अर्थ सापडत नाही,
प्रयत्नाना माझ्या यश सापडत नाही,
प्रेमाला माझ्या प्रेम सापडत नाही,
कष्टाना माझ्या फळ सापडत नाही,
दुक्हाना माझ्या समाधान सापडत नाही,
सुखाना माझ्या आयु सापडत नाही,
विश्वासाला माझ्या आधार सापडत नाही,
जीवनाला माझ्या कारण सापडत नाही,
कवितेला माझ्या पूर्णविराम ही सापडत नाही.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
diwali then......diwali now....
Its diwali time. i cant wait to burst crackers. each day of the diwali has to be enjoyed to the fullest. as usual i always go to my mom, make that innocent face and ask for 100rs to buy crackers. then i'll go to my dad, make that innocent face again and try to get another 100rs saying that its for me and my brother:) only i know how many crackers added to my brother's share. Also, my uncle bought crackers for me. The sparks, the crackers, the rockets, fountains, those green bombs which we usually placed in a soda can and burst. i still remember how the bomb used to tear apart the tin can. The rocket skyrocketing in a flash and burtsing with aesthetic luminosity. A rather gibberish feature of the festival that i liked was the smell of gunpowder in the surrounding. and somehow i am always so enthusiastic about the festival. i find no need for the sunrise as the nights are much more brighter. the entire city lights up to lanterns, diyas and fireworks.
fortunately or unfortunately, i dont know, but i am just reminiscing. this is not the diwali i am celebrating but this is the diwali i celebrated. yet, it feels like yesterday that i celebrated diwali zealously. the scenario is different now. the festival hasn't changed its description. but i have changed. today, this festival, for me, is about sweets, lanterns, diyas, decorations, lightings and rangoli. i do not wish to hear the 'tantrum' of crackers nor i have a vested interest in smelling the gunpowder in the environment. it is not that i have suddenly turned an environmentalist or that i am paranoid over global warming but i possess a different state of mind now. may be i found pleasure and peace in boisterous celebrations. however, i am more into colours and silent aesthetic luminosity and sweets. though one thing i'd admit that i don't have a sweet tooth for all the diwali sweets but by the end of the festival i do get nauseated by the site of them. Surprisingly, this diwali i drew a large rangoli for which i got paid and i was supposed to draw one at my office which i eventually skipped. there is one thing that i love the most during diwali- decorating my hall. i am very much enthusiastic about the decorations. flowers, lanterns, diyas, paintings, decorative and anything that will add to the ambiance of the hall. in the end, i appreciate the beauty of my own decorations, invite friends and relatives for lunch and dinner and have a laugh with family and friends. this is the simple way in which i celebrate my diwali. hope you are celebrating your diwali with equal enthusiasm. HAPPY DIWALI!!
fortunately or unfortunately, i dont know, but i am just reminiscing. this is not the diwali i am celebrating but this is the diwali i celebrated. yet, it feels like yesterday that i celebrated diwali zealously. the scenario is different now. the festival hasn't changed its description. but i have changed. today, this festival, for me, is about sweets, lanterns, diyas, decorations, lightings and rangoli. i do not wish to hear the 'tantrum' of crackers nor i have a vested interest in smelling the gunpowder in the environment. it is not that i have suddenly turned an environmentalist or that i am paranoid over global warming but i possess a different state of mind now. may be i found pleasure and peace in boisterous celebrations. however, i am more into colours and silent aesthetic luminosity and sweets. though one thing i'd admit that i don't have a sweet tooth for all the diwali sweets but by the end of the festival i do get nauseated by the site of them. Surprisingly, this diwali i drew a large rangoli for which i got paid and i was supposed to draw one at my office which i eventually skipped. there is one thing that i love the most during diwali- decorating my hall. i am very much enthusiastic about the decorations. flowers, lanterns, diyas, paintings, decorative and anything that will add to the ambiance of the hall. in the end, i appreciate the beauty of my own decorations, invite friends and relatives for lunch and dinner and have a laugh with family and friends. this is the simple way in which i celebrate my diwali. hope you are celebrating your diwali with equal enthusiasm. HAPPY DIWALI!!
Monday, October 5, 2009
Untitled Memories.
Memories often act as antecedents to our present opinions or actions. On a larger platform, they are often coined as good memories and bad memories. Scrutinizing your emotions would get tougher if you were asked to title an incident which occured during your childhood wherein, you were promoted to the higher class but your best friend, with whom you spend every moment in the class, failed, as good or bad. Especially, at an age when your intelligence progresses abreast your social augumentation, you can least avoid being skeptical about the past. Many among us would opt for a second chance for a particular incident in their past. The feeling persists that they could strive for a better outcome had they been given the chance to do so. However, commenting on this facet would be irrelevant as the topic of interest is memories.
Yet, i take some trouble to write about the derangement in the ideologies because i wish to describe a different class of memories. I term them as 'untitled' memories. I have a few memories which, even after years of maturity, will put me into dilemma if i was forced to term them good or bad. Those are moments in my life which i could just say,"It happened". Also, i do not wish to hint that those memories are insignificant. A recent example that i could recollect was when i drank for the first time. After i got drunk, I cried. Yet, i cannot term it as a good memory or bad memory because i feel it just happened. may be if it wasn't for that day it would have been for some other day that the same incidence might have occurred. also, if i had the chance to change anything about that incident i doubt i would be willing to. And as i categorize these memories as 'untitled' they do not lose their significance because those were the moments in my life which triggered a new facet in me. Ofcourse, i haven't turned a drunkard:)
You might wonder for a second as to why am i mentioning these memories. It is because they keep coming back to me again and again and i find myself in a dilemma whether i wish to forget them or cherish them. This blog would have been much interesting if i had to mention all my untitled memories. However, considering the hypocrite i am i do not think it would be a wise decision. It is not that i fear revealing my private life but it is for the fact that the one reading it would surely categorize it as a good or bad memory on my behalf judging me on the basis of the knowledge he or she possess. there are things in life i did because i believed they had to occur. And in a further span i'd be having more untitled memories for sure.
Yet, i take some trouble to write about the derangement in the ideologies because i wish to describe a different class of memories. I term them as 'untitled' memories. I have a few memories which, even after years of maturity, will put me into dilemma if i was forced to term them good or bad. Those are moments in my life which i could just say,"It happened". Also, i do not wish to hint that those memories are insignificant. A recent example that i could recollect was when i drank for the first time. After i got drunk, I cried. Yet, i cannot term it as a good memory or bad memory because i feel it just happened. may be if it wasn't for that day it would have been for some other day that the same incidence might have occurred. also, if i had the chance to change anything about that incident i doubt i would be willing to. And as i categorize these memories as 'untitled' they do not lose their significance because those were the moments in my life which triggered a new facet in me. Ofcourse, i haven't turned a drunkard:)
You might wonder for a second as to why am i mentioning these memories. It is because they keep coming back to me again and again and i find myself in a dilemma whether i wish to forget them or cherish them. This blog would have been much interesting if i had to mention all my untitled memories. However, considering the hypocrite i am i do not think it would be a wise decision. It is not that i fear revealing my private life but it is for the fact that the one reading it would surely categorize it as a good or bad memory on my behalf judging me on the basis of the knowledge he or she possess. there are things in life i did because i believed they had to occur. And in a further span i'd be having more untitled memories for sure.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
FULLSTOP.
An end to everything,
Or a new beginning,
A full stop not always,
Marks the ending.
It may be a start,
To a new sentence or chapter,
That adds more meaning,
Or a whole new meaning thereafter.
If it acts as a finish line,
It leaves you behind,
To ponder upon or learn,
What you read beforehand.
A small dot on the paper,
Is a significant sign,
So distinguishable from a twin,
That completes a letter ‘i’.
A terminator, a discriminator,
A tiny entity,
With a larger character,
Present in every story.
So next time you see,
A full stop as you read,
Remember you’ve collected,
A little information indeed.
Or a new beginning,
A full stop not always,
Marks the ending.
It may be a start,
To a new sentence or chapter,
That adds more meaning,
Or a whole new meaning thereafter.
If it acts as a finish line,
It leaves you behind,
To ponder upon or learn,
What you read beforehand.
A small dot on the paper,
Is a significant sign,
So distinguishable from a twin,
That completes a letter ‘i’.
A terminator, a discriminator,
A tiny entity,
With a larger character,
Present in every story.
So next time you see,
A full stop as you read,
Remember you’ve collected,
A little information indeed.
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